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Wed, May. 2nd, 2012, 05:35 pm
this is goodbye and i will miss you, but I'm glad it's over

It's not fair that you blame me for where we are now. I tried and you know, but I can't anymore, you've exhausted my very last drop patience with your possessiveness and controlling nature. I could't be in a golden cage any longer. I loved you so much at one point I did see us forming a family and living together. But you tore that thought out of me with your verbal and physical abuse. I lost all hope for us then, I could't say goodbye because you are all I've known for the past four years, you were my most intimate friend and companion. Now I feel lost and lonely, while you've already moved on and slept with four people, it's okay. We've been broken up since November, I've been nothing but honest of where my feelings stood for you. You can't blame me for being confused, I spent four inseparable years with you and it was not easy to do what I did. I did what I know we both agree is best and it's to be separated once and for all. It is so hard to know that I can't pick up the phone and call you or text you, because you hate me.  I probably don't make much sense, I'm so sad and conflicted it all. I wish I could forever keep certain part of you in my life but most of you hurts me. You hurt me all the time, I couldn't stand it anymore, your sudden mood changes, one minute you love me the next minute you wish me dead and the worst of life. Your words are just that words but some hurt, soon all those words will be forgotten just like the love I had for you it will be gone along with your abuse. I am grieving the death of our relationship as turbulent as it was there were parts where I wished they'd never end. I am mourning the loss of our connection, the loss of how amazing it was to make you laugh, the loss of those silly moments where we would talk for hours about anything and everything. A part of me had died and I need to heal and regain strength to be the person I was before I met you. That vibrant girl full of life and light ready to take the world with my open and inviting soul. 

Eres una estupida te odio a veces quisiera decirtelo en tu cara, pero para que, para que verte de nuevo quisiera que nunca en mi vida te volviera a ver. Fuiste una perdida, my alma se undio junto a ti. Me robaste my alegria y energia enigmatica que siempre todos admiraban de me. Ahora soy un cascaron de lo que era, sera dificil pero yo se que voy a ser la Gemma que fui antes de it. Hasta nunca Ana.